*A little side note to all my avid readers not from around here: School was canceled two days before our TWO WEEK Christmas vacation (seriously, are they trying to kill me? not like i had a gazillion things i was trying to finish up!) because it snowed about 3-4 inches...I hope all of you sitting in your 3-4 feet of snow are getting a good chuckle at the wimps who live in Utah's Dixie. Any who- I digress- back to my story:
Schools canceled, the kids are home acting wild and crazy 'cuz- hello? WE HAVE SNOW! Honestly my house was total mayhem and I was hosting the book club Christmas party that night. So what did I do? I did what any rational woman would do, I called my lovely husband and said, "I'm leaving. I simply can't sit by and watch them tear the house from stem to stern so I'm out of here for a couple of hours. Please come home two hours before my party and take these crazed maniacs outa here so I can clean and get this place whiped back into shape." Which he did. And I did. The party ,on a side note, was super fun as always- I luvs me my pack of chicks.
I have two babysitters at my house. Adam and Audrey. They don't do too well together; but they both have their strong points and they both like to babysit with a friend; which is great with me.
PHASE ONE
Audrey and her friend Jamie took the first shift babysitting during my snow day absence. All the kids went out and made a snow man. See cute pictures below:
Grant just loving the snow man.
Lucy putting the final touches on...
Who doesn't need a glamor shot with a snow man?PHASE TWO
SERIOUSLY?
WHAT THE H-E-double toothpicks is wrong with my son?!?!?There are a couple of things that jumped into my head when I saw this picture.
1. Does my son need some kind of counseling? Mike has tried to assure me that this is completely normal 13 year old boy behavior. This of course was after he was able to regain control of himself after nearly falling out of his chair laughing when I showed him this picture and told me he actually saw the above offense in person. He had to tell the boys to destroy or be destroyed by that nice lady you refer to as your mother. Which leads me to my second thought:
2. Does my son have a brain in his head? Not only is he dumb enough to modify the girl's creation into a she-male snow nightmare...he left it like that. And took pictures of it!! For his mother to find!!!
I am still questioning whether or not I will actually post this. It is both mortifying and hilarious to me at the same time- that ,my friends, is what being married to a Schoenfeld will do to you. Things that at one point in my life would have had my eyes cast down for weeks just crack me up. I am a broken woman, married to a fun loving man, raising children who press the edges of the appropriateness envelope. That is why I am blaming this entire incident on his father. Thank you very much.
1. Does my son need some kind of counseling? Mike has tried to assure me that this is completely normal 13 year old boy behavior. This of course was after he was able to regain control of himself after nearly falling out of his chair laughing when I showed him this picture and told me he actually saw the above offense in person. He had to tell the boys to destroy or be destroyed by that nice lady you refer to as your mother. Which leads me to my second thought:
2. Does my son have a brain in his head? Not only is he dumb enough to modify the girl's creation into a she-male snow nightmare...he left it like that. And took pictures of it!! For his mother to find!!!
I am still questioning whether or not I will actually post this. It is both mortifying and hilarious to me at the same time- that ,my friends, is what being married to a Schoenfeld will do to you. Things that at one point in my life would have had my eyes cast down for weeks just crack me up. I am a broken woman, married to a fun loving man, raising children who press the edges of the appropriateness envelope. That is why I am blaming this entire incident on his father. Thank you very much.
13 comments:
I don't care who you are, that right there is funny. Very very nice. Thanks once again Schoenfelds for giving us a great laugh...
You are such a fantastic writer!!!! I just giggled at this post....I love your kids!
Robyn
Oh. Ouch. Laughing. FUNNY!!!!!!
First of all, I am impressed you can whip everything together in 2 hours and still throw a great party! I banned kids from my house all day Christmas Eve just to clean up for the evening. Second, we also ran away on snow day and left all the kids to work it out at home. However, we did not come home to a transgender snowman, only a snow fort. Hmmm wait a minute…. was my 17 year old at your house. I believe he could make a similar creation!
too funny!! ummm, maybe we should also discuss the mile long stick penis that appears on the snowman.
Ummmm...did you not notice the stick poking out? Maybe, rather than counseling, he needs a little lesson in anatomy!
Thanks for the laugh!
3 or 4 inches of snow right before Christmas, would be just right! Oh well.
adam, adam, adam. perhaps he needs to have "the talk." not "the sex" talk (but judging from all the sexual organs on the snowman, it might not be a bad idea). no, i'm referring to the "never get caught being stupid" talk. but now that i am thinking about it, most 13 year olds seem to have not had that talk. hhhmm. i think what you did was best. take the photographic evidence and post it on the web. good call mom. and its never a dull moment on mitchell street! :)
ohmygosh...I have no words. Truly, I am speechless.
I love the mortified you :0).
That is hilarious! I am so glad you posted those pictures :).
This is laugh out loud good. Tom is now planning a totally new teaching strategy in deacons quorum to deal with this situation.
HOLY FREAKIN' CRAP! I laughed so hard (not only at the picture but at your commentary) that I nearly dropped the baby, while trying not to pee my pants,while reaching for a tissue for the tears streaming down my cheeks! I guarantee you that Mike was EXACTLY the same as a 13 yr old boy...as a matter of fact he might do it now, but he has probably learned not to leave evidence for you to find. :D
I LOVE your family!!!! :D
I'm in tears. Really. I didn't even catch the 3 foot long phallic symbol until I took a 2nd glance; I was too focused on the coal-nips to see it. I am laughing just thinking about Adam forming snow-breasts. He got to 2nd base with a snowman. Lucky boy.
Well Mary Ann, you know me...I am offended by this post. Why haven't the blog police removed this??? Totally Mike's fault, I agree!
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